DEUCES, Happy Endings Style

Au revior to responsibility, taking the bus at 6:30 am, rainy days and the deranged furball who wakes me up at the crack of dawn every morning.

Happy Endings .gifs via

Helllooooooo to a suitcase fulla' bikinis and 10 days of vegetating and sunning my bum in three different states.

Oh. And hello to the most gaw-jess boyf on God's green earth. Raise the roof for him putting up with me for a WHOLE YEAR.

As of 3:15pm, I'm in a California state of mind.

Vacay

I knooooooooow, I know. I take weird blog sabbaticals every now and then which happen to coincide with how "busy" my life gets. And by busy I mean watch entire series of shows after work (Friday Night Lights, Downton Abbey, Revenge, etc.) or clean up my dog's explosive diarrhea just hours after a landlord visit. Stuff like that is far from blog-worthy since I don't think bragging about watching 5 episodes of Breaking Bad in one night is my proudest moment. But, as my trusty childhood babysitter reminded me (Hi Micah!), this is how a teeny corner of the world keeps up with my life so keep writing.

Aside from nursing school, the singular speck on my horizon is an upcoming ten day vacation. TEN glorious days. I'm spending part of it romping around Seattle with the Great Forrest Underwood (who's going to Sasquatch, duh); part in my hometown where I regularly ride a rusty beach cruiser to grandma's house, eat all the junk I want and pass out in a backyard bikini every afternoon; and the final half in California on an anniversary trip with the boyf. 

Courtesy of my tumblr

Highlights of said trip to include visiting The Mouse and staying a night in the Beverly Hilton (where Whitney DIED). I dug up my old Disneyland autograph book from my last visit in 1999 AND my white leather fanny pack, both of which will accompany me to the Happiest Place on Earth whether the man likes it or not. At the Beverly Hilton I'm obviously going to let Whitney's presence guide me to the room of her death where I will soak up her greatness and then channel it into a profitable singing career. I will also do my best to nonchalantly take pics of all celeb sightings. My paparazzi chops have been honed taking pictures of oddball hobos on the King County Bus each day and since famous people pay about as much attention to me as a transient bag lady, we shouldn't have a problem. 

Unreal, right? She literally has more belongings than me.

Georgia on my mind

Most people take 5 days off of work to go to the Grand Canyon. Hawaii. New York. Etc. I am not most people. Last week I took off  for the great states of Georgia & Florida to see my partner in crime. 


I was expecting to lay by the pool during each 85* day, go to a bitchin Eric Church concert, be a tourist, the works. Instead my bikinis collected dust, I cooked like an Iron Chef for 3 hungry boys and a dog and spent about 8+ hours in a car and 18 on a plane back and forth. Not complaining though - I had a blast and fell in love with another po-dunk Southern town (how does this keep happening to me?)


I used to be realllllly good at taking pictures while adventuring but now I seem to having way too much fun to snap anything other than a few shoddy iPhone pics...so that's what you get. I will say that Drake White/Brantley Gilbert/Eric Church put on a helluva show - easily one of the best I've ever seen. And yes, the rumors are true...Eric Church smokes buckets of green during his sets but it's hard to care when the music's THAT GOOD. This concert had an inordinate amount of rednecks, croakies, Sperry Top Siders and visors. Good riddance Florida, have you any sense of decency? (This coming from the girl who wears a men's flannel from Wal-Mart)


I've been home for 2 days and I'm still riding that vacation high. And I've still got Georgia and it's inhabitants (...or just one) on my mind.

Hellooooo Eric!

'Merrrricaaaaa!

Major pyrotechnics on display...to hide all the subversive weed smoking

Strek and Casper, the friendly Seattle ghost. 

Reunited with one of the greatest

I Own Tonight

It's FINALLY HERE!


Tonight I've got a date with destiny. Not really, but I do have a 7 pm sing-a-long scheduled at Key Arena with these peeps. Can we say AWESOME birthday present?

Despite the fact that I detest her Cruella Deville hair and his affinity for Newsies caps, I'm excited to see them

Thumbs Up & Down

Thumbs Up

• It's Friday and I'm headed home to Oregon for the weekend
• Tomorrow is my favorite day of the year
• Lady Antebellum and I have a date in 4 days
• Headed off to meet my old friend, the sun, in Florida and Georgia next week

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Thumbs Down

• My application to RN school in South Carolina got turned down and Charleston remains my Great White Buffalo
• My right earbud is hopelessly stuck in my hair at the moment
• Going home means a 4+ hour drive after an 8+ hour work day. Thank goodness I'll have my trusty sidekick...who lets me dress her up as ET from time to time

Suri's Burn Book

Yesterday I was introduced (by my boss) to one of the funniest Tumblr's I've ever lain peeps on: Suri's Burn Book. This little piece of brilliance curated by "Suri Cruise" (daughter of TomKat) is a deadpan chronicle of various other Hollywood half-pints and their decided lack of sartorial judgement. She frequently mocks her famous parental units and gives the general public snippets of her aristocratic penchants and plebian distaste. The way she relentlessly mocks the Affleck family's affinity for Croc's, shapeless hand-me-downs and altogether lack of taste is beyond entertaining. Rarely do I actually laugh out loud when blog trolling but this one got a few out me.  


Some of my favorites include:

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 "Tom really wants us to start pairs-skating competitively. I told him not until his triple toe loop improves and only if our team name can be The Princess & the Pea. "

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 "This is the grossest thing I’ve seen since Katie decided leggings are pants. Oh, Valentina, I just hope you are fully vaccinated."

Totally Taking Credit For This

From Ben the Bachelor's final blog on People.com (collective "Hallelujahs!" are in order):

"My final blog as The Bachelor. Aside from having hair that looked like a water buffalo, the day I proposed was an exciting day. This damn hair. Maybe it is time for a cut." 

Clearly he read my blog yesterday. And OBVIOUSLY my words were the straw that broke the water buffalo's back. T'will be the best day ever when he lops the ole' mop. Though initially slightly confused at his mammalian reference (Water Buffs don't really have hair), I googled the African beast and found this:

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Though without a discernible coif it looks like these creatures enjoy getting themselves in deep you-know-whatttttt. Ben's proved that he's good at the same so perhaps the comparison is well deserved after all.