King County Metro Route 31: You Suck

As of October 13, 2011 I officially became a commuter when my employer gave me a shiny new ORCA card and a $3.25 daily incentive to use it. I consider that $3.25 Seattle Children's small way of saying, "Thank you KT for waking up at 5:15 every morning and waiting in the cold/dark/dampness at 6:40 to ride to worst route ever into work." Let me assure you that "worst route ever" is not some dredged up hyperbole for the blog's sake. Allow me to guide you through my commute so you'll better understand the hell that has become my mornings.


6:38 am - Give Davy Crockett a tasty antler to chew on, kiss her wrinkled brow and head out the door


6:39 am - Walk 25 steps to the corner of Thorndyke W. & Boston to wait for the bus


6:42 am - Spy the bus cresting over the south hill of Thorndyke. Rummage through the vortex that is my purse for an ID badge


6:42:30 am - See bus is not slowing down for my stop


6:42:31 am - Wave both hands frantically, scream STOP! repeatedly and literally chase down the bus


6:42:45 am - Bus either continues lumbering along or screeches over to pick me up


This happens at least twice a week, regardless of the bus driver (regular vs. substitute) and puts me in a dour mood the entire ride into work. Seriously, if a girl can't enjoy her Angry Birds on the bus, how can the day possibly go well? In an attempt to get noticed I've tried waving a cell phone, standing in the street and, like today, wearing this little eyesore (see below) but nothing works. 

If the driver actually does stop for me (how can you not when there's a girl screaming in the street, chasing you down and banging her fist on the side of the bus), I really let him have it. Usually along the lines of, "I am there EVERY DAY at the SAME TIME and you do this EVERY WEEK. LEARN YOUR ROUTE." And the responses I get are all over the map.


"There needs to be a light there" (No shit, Sherlock)


"You need to wave a light or something" (Yeah...tried that)


"Go to another bus stop with a light" (Seeing as none on my side of the street are lit, that's not gonna fly)


"I'm so sorry! Didn't even see you there. I'll put in a request for a light" (Bless you)


"You're gonna get hit doing that" (Frealz dude and I can't wait until I do and you lose your job because of it and then they'll probably make a movie out of me like the surfer who got her arm bitten off by a shark)


Today, while wearing the above hoodie and frantically waving my white mime gloves (thanks mom!) the guy finally pulled over (almost flattening me in the process) and I really let him have it. For a brief moment I was afraid I was going to get kicked off the bus BUT I stood my ground against that ogre driver. He gave every excuse above but I just kept yelling that he needed to get a clue and pay a shit's worth of attention to the bus stops on his route. I reiterated, I'm here EVERY day of the work week and I get passed MULTIPLE times a week. He informed me he drives this route every day and I'm never there. Um DUH dude...because I ride at 6:42 every day, not your scheduled time.


Fueled by my righteous anger, I called the KC Metro hot line and spent 10 minutes waiting to offer my complaint. The lady informed me that she'd submit it and try to get a light put on my corner (THE LIGHT ISN'T THE POINT) and I firmly told her that wasn't going to cut it. I wanted someone to contact me about this since it's been a weekly occurrence for the past 2+ months. I forced her to take down my number and have someone give me a call back or else I will heckle and hassle them until something changes. And I seriously will. There's a reason Strek calls me The Unstoppable Force and a reason my dad got all his gray hair during my adolescence. I won't quit until something changes. 


So mark my words people - I will win this. And if one of my lovely drivers is reading this - I will get you. And, fingers crossed, there will come a time when I never have to get my daily exercise by chasing down the bus.